6 years and counting is a letter that I wrote. 6 years ago I said goodbye to one of the most harmful relationships in my life…my relationship to drugs. I wanted to share this. I hope that it provides hope or encouragement to anyone that is dealing with or has dealt with addiction.
6 years ago I said goodbye to you. I wanted something better. I hoped that I could be happy. I needed to feel.
You took so much from me. Because of you, I lost so much time…time that I will never get back. While some of the relationships you took from me can and have been mended, there are some that I can never repair because those people are gone.
You see, you stole me from my family and friends…and I let you. You stole my dreams, you stole my hope. You made me believe that I didn’t deserve to live.
The worst part of all of this though…there are times that I still think about you. I can still feel and smell you. And it makes me sick to my stomach every time it happens…but it does still happen.
I hate the fact that you had so much power. That I gave myself to you so very freely. That I didn’t have the strength to tell you no.
The more you hurt me…the more I wanted you. It was like I couldn’t get enough.
I am so glad we parted ways. You see…while I may still think about you from time to time…I will NEVER let you into my life again. I have healed and moved forward. I found love and learned how to finally love myself. I know that I deserve so much better than you ever gave me.
If you or someone you know needs help, please reach out. Don’t give up hope. Because without hope, we are all lost…