So…I have been big the majority of my life. One of the biggest things that I have struggled with in my life is being happy with who I am. Loving myself. But Ru Paul says it best…how can I love someone else when I can’t love myself. And the more I have thought about it…this isn’t just a big girl problem. This is a problem that every woman has.
I have personally struggled with self-love since I was a child. 1And there were many contributing factors that went into that, including sexual abuse at the hands of my stepfather when I was 8 years old. To say the least, that definitely formed some opinions in my mind about my worth, or lack thereof.
Now as an adult, I have taken steps to change this thinking. I have done the therapy and all that. And while I think it did probably make some impact, that wasn’t the thing that changed my thinking. Because after the therapy, I still married 2 men that treated me like a doormat, that verbally abused me, and physically abused me. It wasn’t until I decided that I wanted better that I realized that I needed to be better.
Girls…..let me tell you…I made a list. I literally wrote on paper everything I wanted in a man.
..and everything I didn’t want. I prayed over that list. I had a friend perform rituals over that list. But I also worked on what I was bringing to the table. I worked on my communication…on my anger issues. I looked at where I felt I was lacking. Now am I there 100%…oh hell no! But I’m working on it.
We will constantly be a work in progress. None of us have “arrived”…and if someone says that they have…know that bitch is lying! I have found that as I work on different areas of my life, I am happier…and so is my husband.
So get your glitter on ladies …and spread that glitter to others. Because we all need to sparkle!